Oh Great, They’ve Got a . . . Tiger?

The Walking Dead SDCC 2016 Coverage By R.C. Murphy

The annual walker invasion at San Diego Comic-Con took place from July 21st through the 24th. Okay, there were a few thousand other people there, as well. Comic-Con is kind of a big thing, if you’ve lived under a rock for the last few years.

One of the most anticipated panels this year was The Walking Dead. Lucy had some ‘splainin’ to do about that angst-generating cliffhanger ending. Which is why Robert Kirkman struck that iron while hot shortly after the producers took the stage. Aside from numerous statements defending the ending since the finale, he simply added that fans would love the payoff from waiting so long for the reveal. We’ll agree to disagree, as we have since he first stepped on a soapbox to defend knee-capping Negan’s big moment.

What’s new for season seven? The producers confirmed a visit to The Kingdom, plus many more survivors and locations. Gale Anne Hurd meowed at one point, which baffled show fans who haven’t delved into the comic world. Kirkman admitted that once the show took off, he included things in the comics they’d never put on television. The show’s other producers picked up the gauntlet and plan to include some of the outlandish comic ideas into season seven. Sometimes these things bites one in the backside. In this case, one idea can bite off an entire backside and then some.

Right before they premiered the trailer, Nicotero shared new walker concept art. Looks like we’ve got more burned walkers on the way, plus the older walkers continue to become more mummy-like, and I don’t even know what happened to the bulgy walker. Death by bee hive attack?

Okay, on to the trailer.

I was really looking forward to seeing Jeffrey Dean Morgan swaggering on the screen. Instead, we got a rehash of the finale’s final scene, along with a cliché memorial video of sorts superimposed over Lucille. I would’ve gladly taken just the cropped shot of him slamming Lucille down on an unseen victim after a pan of the group by the RV. Instead they padded the footage with what is essentially an overly emotional teen girl’s video scrapbook. All that’s missing is the sappy song. The second half of the trailer delivers new characters, but too fast to identify any faces. We meet Ezekiel, leader at The Kingdom. Something we’ve rarely seen on this show is animals. Well, that’s about to change. There’s beasties coming. Most notably, Shiva, Ezekiel’s pet tiger. Funny how a few years ago, the show’s budget was nitpicked right and left. Suddenly they’re okay with tossing huge chunks of cash in to make CG animals.

The actors hit the stage when the trailer wrapped. Andrew Lincoln told fans, “Hang in there, guys.” He went on to say Jeffrey Dean Morgan has way too much fun as Negan. Which, as we already know, is probably creepy as hell on set, despite JDM’s infectious smile. There’s just something about a grinning guy wielding a barbed wire-wrapped baseball bat to make one’s sphincter clench. Lauren Cohan said, “We go to very physical and emotional places.”

the-walking-dead-season-7-poster-rosita

Pretty standard quo for this show, but things are just beginning to take a turn for the worst. Nicotero confirmed it when he said this [their current situation with Negan] isn’t rock bottom.

The panel devolved into talk about on-set pranks and several cast members doing impressions of other actors. They did air the footage from when Reedus dumped a ton of confetti in Lincoln’s car air ducts. The first time I watched it, I couldn’t breathe because I laughed so hard.

I wasn’t happy with TWD at the end of season six, and they still haven’t done much to convince me they grossly mishandled Negan’s entrance. Yes, we get a flippin’ tiger next season, as well as a smarmy yet charming Big Bad, but fans are kind of a puppy kicked too many times. They’ve promised so many grand things, what happens if these season seven grand plans fizzle like the drawn-out Beth storyline?

Once you jump the tiger, there’s no going back. Hope they have a solid game plan going into this highly unpredictable season.


Possible Zombie Activity: The Driving Dead

Field report from Red Brigade Sergeant at Arms:

The Zombie Survival Crew command center recently received notification of a frightening new development in the struggle against the undead.

The Illinois Department of Transportation will soon be launching an awareness campaign in the form of a webseries entitled “The Driving Dead.”  Details are sketchy, but we have learned our Special Forces Commander Michael Rooker is closely involved in this secretive project, and the official launch date is Monday August 25, 2014.

It goes without saying that if the worst has happened and the dead have learned how to drive, we will have to adjust our tactics considerably. But we are confident that Commander Rooker has already taken charge of the situation and will advise us of any future developments.

In the meantime, keep an eye on the website: drivingdeadseries.com and watch social media for any further alerts.


Can Music Be Used as a Weapon?

LindseyStirlingZombies

**ZOMBIE ACTIVITY ALERT**

Here at ZSC headquarters we receive volumes of information from all parts of the globe on a daily basis, alerting us to potential zombie activity. Most of the evidence coming in is suspicion rather than concrete fact, so you can imagine how exciting things got around here when we had actual film footage of zombie activity.

Now that we have the footage, we are studying it from all angles to glean what we can. At our focal point is the violin phenom, Lindsey Stirling. Is she friend? Or has she joined forces with the zombie underground? Through the actual footage it is hard to tell. At some points she appears to be able to hold off a zombie attack through music and using the violin bow like a sword to threaten the oncoming zombies. BUT she also joins their band.

Not surprisingly, the zombies are deflected from their purpose momentarily, but then remember they want to eat and a tender morsel has wandered into their midst. All of our research indicates zombies have a firm grip on their single purpose — which is to wipe out humanity one bite at a time. Watch the video yourself and tell us what you think. Is Lindsey friend or foe?

 

 

Photo credit: Devin Graham

Photo credit: Devin Graham

WHO IS LINDSEY STIRLING?

In 2010 she was voted off America’s Got Talent and a short-sighted Piers Morgan told her the world had no place for a dancing dub-step violinist. The world has disagreed. Lindsey has gone her own way since then building her fan base doing the thing she loves most, playing the violin and dancing. A true joy to watch and experience. She now travels the world to share her amazing talent with everyone.

Her fabulous YouTube station has a little bit for everyone as she mixes her original compositions with covers of theatrical, video games, and pop. Amazing performances in every one. And if you even half way like the Phantom of the Opera, check out her stunning video. Music is a powerful force and one which can be harnessed to unearth emotions in people … And apparently it can unearth zombies as well. How did Lindsey know to use music against the zombies? And why does she play and dance with creatures who want nothing more than to make her a midnight snack? More research will be required and we’re going to start with her debut album:

 

LindseyStirling

 

Website | Facebook | YouTube | Store


Special News Report: You Have A Right To Be Concerned

From inside the zombie bunny cages of RC Murphy

Alert Level: HIGH

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Alexander Kinyua

Earlier this week we brought you reports of a man in Miami, Florida that attacked and consumed his victim’s face before being shot and killed by local police. Official reports are stating that the attacker may have been suffering severe psychosis from use of a synthetic drug with the street name of “bath salts” (Not to be confused with the rose and lavender bath salts you gave your grandmother for Mother’s Day). As more witness statements are released, we realize that if the drugs are indeed to blame, then manufacturers may have found a way to turn living, breathing humans into the closest thing we’ve seen to a zombie.

On the heels of that startling attack comes another. In Baltimore, Maryland a college student claims to have murdered a man and then proceeded to eat portions of his brain and the entirety of his heart before dismembering his body. The assailant kept the head and hands, then disposed of the remaining pieces of the body in a dumpster at a nearby church. As of right now authorities are unsure if Alexander Kinyua actually ingested any portion of his victim—pending a full autopsy report from the coroner.

Unlike the Miami incident, there are no noticeable signs that drugs fueled the attack. Local police refused to comment or make assumptions on the mental health of Kinyua to determine if that factors into his disturbing behavior.

Kujoe Agyei-Kodie

What would push a seemingly healthy human to attack, kill, and supposedly eat someone that’d lived with his family for the last six months? This wasn’t the first time this month that Kinyua attacked another person. The first assault happened about a week prior to his cannibalistic confession. It was reported that, after sitting with a baseball bat clutched in his hands and muttering to himself for several minutes, Kinyua beat a fellow student. That victim was treated for severe injuries, including a fractured skull that cost him the sight in one of his eyes. Before that, classmates and neighbors considered Kinyua to be a decent guy, a little quirky, but always willing to help. His behavior did a full turnabout in the matter of weeks. But why? That is the most difficult part to figure out.

We’re growing increasingly concerned at the news reports coming across the Command Center desk. This report of cannibalism is not the second, but third, extremely violent incident in a matter of weeks—all located on the east coast.

Two of the locations coincide with the travel schedule of our leader, Juliette. Last weekend, she was just hours from Miami during the assault. This week, she made her way to Baltimore in preparation for the Philadelphia Comic-Con within days of the attack. She had no clue about it until we sent out a warning broadcast to commanders in the area.

Is there something in the water? The locations are too far spread out for any sensible source to be pinpointed. All we can do is warn brigadiers to remain vigilant.

If you see someone or something suspicious, do not engage. This is not an outbreak as far as we’ve determined. Report all incidents to local police. We will be monitoring things from ZSC Command. If any more details surface that alter our opinion on a possible outbreak, you will be notified.


Special News Report: Get Your Go Bags Ready

From behind the zombie bunny cages of RC Murphy
Alert Level: High

We interrupt our regularly scheduled Commander Monday segment to bring you vital information which may indicate the zombie apocalypse may be heating up.

Often we hear news tidbits that force us to double-check our go bags and weaponry. However, nothing caught our attention about the reality of what we’re facing in the near future like this news article from the Miami Herald.

Here’s a rundown of what the police have released so far. On Saturday May, 26th at approximately 2:00 PM local time, police received reports that two men were in an altercation on a bicycle path alongside a freeway off ramp. Police arrived on the scene and described the situation as a nude man hunched over another man…apparently eating his face.

Yes, you read that right. They claim that the attacker chowed down on the victim’s face. Police used verbal warnings to break up the situation. When that proved ineffective, they shot him. The first shot had no apparent affect. Five more shots were fired into the attacker, according to witness reports. The attacker died on the scene. Paramedics took the victim to a nearby hospital in serious condition—his face unrecognizable.

Police theories right now state that the attacker was suffering from “cocaine psychosis”, which drives a person insane as they literally cook from the inside out (this also explains why he was found nude during the assault).

The police are allowed their theories. We’re allowed ours. Numerous ZSC brigadiers brought this article to our attention, and we thank them for that. This may indeed be a drug-induced psychosis as Miami police claim. Or it could be the first wave in zombie activity. The fact that the man did not react as a human should when the first shot was fired is disconcerting. Lack of pain response is one of the first signs we look for when determining if a person is in fact infected by the zombie virus. It is very rare that psychotic rages push someone to the point of devouring a living human, despite what we’ve seen in the movies. There must be something more to the story than what they’re telling the public.

Also, it is significant to note this incident took place while our commander-in-chief, Juliette Terzieff, is at Spooky Empire May-hem educating the masses on how to respond during a zombie apocalypse. Coincidence? We don’t think so. The chief has checked in to assure everyone her go bag is with her and ready to go. She has given the pre-deployment signal to command, so we are standing by awaiting her further instructions at this time. We are on high alert, and this is NOT a drill.

Please, be on your guard. We will be keeping a close eye on any further reports from the Miami police regarding this situation.


Zombies in Music

I told y’all the zombiepocalypse was coming soon! Now we have zombies living every day normal lives in music videos! *twitches*

My friend Jimmy Joyce and I have spent a few nights talking until sunrise because he’s cool like that, and it usually happens after a show I’ve gone to watch. We all know Jinxie is nocturnal, but hey, that’s when the zombies are active, people. Jimmy is in a few bands, and I mean like four or five…or I could just be thinking of Michael Mahoney’s multiple-band status, but whatever. The two of them are in Money Shot together, which is the cover band I tend to see.

Terrible People is one of Jimmy’s other bands, and I thought I’d share this awesome video with you. This is their song “Bill Murray” and it’s pretty damn good, if you ask me.

Warning: mature content

Please check out their Facebook page as well.

And for all you zombies out there? You even have your own Facebook-type site to mingle on, which you saw in the video. Zombiebook.org. Check it out. It’s run by Jay Zombie. Of course I’m a member. Someone has to keep an eye on the zombies over there!

Jinxie G

Commander

Yellow Brigade

 


Zombie Activity in Danville, VT

Breaking News

This sign was spotted in Danville, Vermont on Tuesday July 12, 2011. Once the local news was made aware and started to broadcast it, the sign was quickly changed.

All local news sources are now reporting that the message on the road sign is the work of hackers. And although many angry and even potentially violent people were spotted, the official word was that it was in response to long traffic delays and not a zombie invasion.

However, I remain skeptical of the official word as the only government official to make a statement was a bit vague in his response.

“No zombie attack has occurred, as far as I know,” chuckled Vt. transportation secretary Brian Searles.

I will continue to monitor the situation and will report any new developments as soon as I can.

Sarah Q
Blue Brigade

Thanks to Blue Brigade faithful, Sarah Q for bringing this to our attention. All crew members must remain alert and report any signs of zombie activity to command as soon as known.