RoZwell: Review for Z Nation 209 By A. Zombie
10k and Doc are all aboard the alien theory train. It just gets worse when the crew rolls into Roswell, New Mexico in a Thing—no, not the orange rock-looking guy; it’s a car. On the way into town, they encounter a strange aircraft. It kills the Thing’s electrical system, garbles the radio, and slap-chops a zombie down the road with a light beam, ensuring they travel safely.
In town, there’s people gathered at a UFO-themed restaurant. Roy, the gentleman organizing the orientation, says they’re waiting for Bernadette to relay a message from the aliens: It’s time to hop onboard and take to the stars. According to her, it’ll be six days until the exodus. How does she know so much about alien plans? They talk to her, of course. The aliens picked Bernadette to be their voice to the masses after saving her from a zombie one evening. Since then they’ve been thick as thieves, planning how best to save the human race. They were just waiting for one key element—Murphy. Yeah, it’s not enough to save mankind, but he’s also the emissary for the human race, as chosen by the aliens.
Not everyone is on her side. Dan Scully—yes, they went there—swears Bernadette has it all wrong. The aliens aren’t coming to Earth, they’re already here. He goes on to warn the crew not to listen to Bernadette; she’ll get them all killed. Dan is my favorite part of the episode. He’s played by veteran creature actor Doug Jones, who frankly does not get enough credit in the genre. It’s great to see him playing human for once.
Roberta asks Bernadette—who has an uncanny ability to simply appear in the conversation—to take them to the nearby air force base. Maybe they can score a ride on that UFO or a forgotten plane. At the very least, they can salvage supplies to stock the Thing for the last push to California. The base itself isn’t impressive and has been picked clean by scavengers or military personnel before they packed it in and ran from the zombies. 10k calls Bernadette out; she knows more about the base than she’s letting on.
Now things get weirder. She takes them to an office and practically demands Doc take a pack of gum from the vending machine. Hey, why is she putting on a seatbelt? Moments later, the room lurches and they descend to a hidden facility deep under the base. Underground, they encounter their first alien. Only, something’s not right about this guy. It attacks. The crew puts it down and nearly dies themselves when the creature’s flight suit self-destructs. Well, that’s a first. At least zombie aliens can be killed the same as the others.
They search the facility. Addy spends some quality time with a high-tech computer. There’s hundreds of files on Murphy and their travels since Colorado. Weird. Not as weird as Bernadette, though. While Addy attempts to use the computer to contact Citizen Z, the others split off to find the aliens. They finally find a living alien. It approaches cautiously, but the moment is broken when an alien zombie interrupts. 10k takes out the alien-z—zalien? The living alien abducts Bernadette, dragging her upstairs. Roberta, Vasquez, and 10k give chase. They find Bernadette caught in the UFO’s light beam. Murphy joins them and the alien’s focus shifts to him. Desperate to save him from abduction, Roberta grabs a future-tech gun 10k found and shoots down the UFO.
Turns out, aliens still aren’t a thing. Dan planned the entire thing. His job was initially to salvage the aircraft for the government. Then he saw Bernadette and wanted to take her with him. I’m not sure how fancying a woman turns into making an alien invasion plot to convince her to go somewhere safer makes sense, but there it is. Poor Dan doesn’t make it. Bernadette gives him Mercy after he turns zombie. What about the other aliens? Test pilots who turned in their suits. Nothing freaky at all. Well, freakier than zombies existing.
The crew rolls out of town without any more incidents. Bernadette returns to her people . . . and lies to their faces. She can’t bring herself to dash their hopes for salvation, so she simply says they have to wait, the aliens don’t feel they’re ready yet.
This episode is a fun diversion to alleviate the mid-season doldrums. Which means the next episode will probably return to the high-tension action from the season’s premiere. I can’t wait.
