Undead Is Not An Option: Crunch Time

Four high-school friends have educated themselves on zombie lore by playing a RPG game they’ve invented. They never dreamed they’d have to put their skills developed in the game to use, but an outbreak of the zombie virus forces their hand. While the town runs amok, they decide to meet in one of their game’s locations and make a final stand. The creator of the rule book, Jimmy, goes to retrieve it, Danny is sent to buy weapons, items a teenager could legally buy, while the ringleader, Joey, and Travis, whose father has fallen victim, stay behind to plan their defense and eventual escape.

Crunch Time brings you into the world of RPG and twitter, something near and dear to the Zombie Survival Crew’s heart, and takes you through the chilling choices which have to be made during a zombie attack.

Please note because the characters are dealing with a zombie outbreak, this excerpt has some strong language.


Crunch Time
by Maria Kelly


Joey Costello wiped the dust from the cheddar puffs onto his jeans and leaned forward to stare at the brightly lit computer monitor. It was his older brother David’s hand-me-down computer: the one that looked like some fucked-up futuristic space-lamp.

He waited for his tweeps to respond. He watched as line upon line in the stream scrolled past, none of them from his crew.

“C’mon, dudes, damn!” he yelled, banging his fist down on the desk.

He cursed again as a whole load of tweets went sailing by, and he had to scroll down to make sure he didn’t miss one from his friends.

“Oh, man, we SO need our own hashtag.” He made a mental note to spring this bit of brilliant wisdom on his tweeps when they got on line. Where the hell where they, anyway?

He was half-way through the tweets when the auto-refresh kicked in and zoomed a hundred more tweets past his eyes.

“Aw, goddammit!” He swore again, but not too loudly. His mom had begun tolerating him dropping the ‘F-bomb’ but she’d tear his ass up if she heard him using that word. Not that his mother was particularly religious, but Aunt Lois was, and Aunt Lois was always over at their place these days since Uncle Reggie passed.

Finally, his trembling finger stilled on the scroll button as he read the message:

2ndTimeDead: RT @ZombieHuntR666 holla back mah boyz when u online.|| I’m on, Z.

“Yes!” Joey whispered as he typed and waited for his message to appear onscreen:

ZombieHuntR666: @2ndTimeDead it is as we feared, brotha!!!

He waited for 2ndTimeDead’s reply:

2ndTimeDead: @ZombieHuntR666 I know that’s right, bro! Saw 2 on way home from Crosswalk. Scared the fuck outta me. What do we do?

ZombieHuntR666: @2ndTimeDead don’t fuckin panic. that’s the most important thing. don’t fuckin panic. u been readin these other tweets?

2ndTimeDead: @ZombieHuntR666 4realz! Both #zombieapocalypsenow and #realzombiegeddon are TT’ing! WTF? They’re all over the world! WTF? #whatthefuck

ZombieHuntR666: @2ndTimeDead i said don’t panic dude. oh shit! SHIT! brb…

2ndTimeDead: @ZombieHuntR666 Joey! WTF? Joey???????

2ndTimeDead: @ZombieHuntR666 Joey i’m fuckin comin over there in about 3 minutes if you don’t tweet me the fuck back!!!!

2ndTimeDead: @ZombieHuntR666 4realz mofo! I aint playin! Are you ok? Joey i swear to god you better not be playin!!!!!!!!!

ZombieHuntR666: @2ndTimeDead damn dude it was just my mom.

2ndTimeDead: @ZombieHuntR666 You scared the fuck outta me asshole!!! I thought one of them got you.

ZombieHuntR666: @2ndTimeDead LOL sorry dude 😛 dude, we need our own hashtag. going thru these tweets is bullshit.

2ndTimeDead: @ZombieHuntR666 Dude, how about #oakleafHSzombies?

Sometimes Danny surprised Joey with a flash of brilliance. Since the zombie virus outbreak in their town seemed to have started at their school, #oakleafHSzombies was the perfect hash.

ZombieHuntR666: @2ndTimeDead Danny Patton you’re a fuckin genius! that’s brilliant i swear to god.

At the thought of his school, Joey’s hands dropped off the keyboard. How many Oak Leaf High School students had already been turned?


To read more, and find out what happens to Joey, Danny and the rest of their friends, check out Undead Is Not An Option.

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