With the holidays upon us, things have been a little hectic around the command center. Not only are processing all the reports coming in of suspected zombie activity, and with the cold temperatures who knows what will happen, the Oracle is dancing around sprinkling tinsel everywhere and has put up so many blinking lights the command center looks like a 70’s discotech. So despite the serious task at hand, command does have the holiday spirit.
And now to bring you a little holiday cheer is the commander of the Orange Brigade, our very own RC Murphy. And if this isn’t proof that she’s been spending too much time with the zombie bunnies, then I don’t know what is.
Walkin’ in a Zombiepocalypse (to the tune of Winter Wonderland)
lyrics by RC Murphy
Zombies groan, can you hear ’em? On the walls, blood is glistenin’ A horrific sight, A world full of fright Walkin’ in a Zombiepocalypse.
Gone away is the old world, Here to stay is a new world Of death everywhere And being so scared, Walkin’ in a Zombiepocalypse.
On the sidewalk lays a rotting body, It begins to twitch and moan and groan. He’ll rise, very hungry We’ll arm up then And blow that sucker’s Brains all over town.
Later on, he’ll expire, As we set him on fire His face full of rage We’re saving the day, Walkin’ in a Zombiepocalypse
Everybody SING! Walkin’ in a Zombiepocalypse… Walkin’ in a Zombiepocalypse… Walkin’ in a Zombiepocalypse…
It has been a wild, crazy, and sometimes downright chaotic twelve months. For those of us who were here when the foundation was laid for the Zombie Survival Crew, those twelve months have flown by. When we sat back recently to look over the progress we’ve made we realized how truly astonishing an accomplishment this empire really is.
And we couldn’t have done it without you, our ever-faithful crew members.
Day by day our numbers grow and we’re introduced to new folks that are eager, ready to take on the shambling horde coming our way with nothing more than a 2×4 and their courage to aid them. The sentiment warms our hearts. It also makes us realize how lucky we are that you all have accepted us so readily. Your support has taken the ZSC from, “I wonder if…” to reality with enough energy left over to drag us into our second year of existence.
Once upon a time my life was normal…or as normal as it ever gets for me. Married. Son grown, out on his own and doing well. I had a job, several hobbies and I was finally finding the time to get back to my writing. Then I began hearing quiet rumblings that the end of the world was coming in 2012.
Uh huh. Right.
Again?
Didn’t we just have one a couple years ago? How many apocalypses….apocalypti?…do we get, anyways?
I didn’t believe in the apocalypse, but events began piling up around my ears until I had no choice but to investigate the possibility that one might actually be headed our way. During my investigation I came across a small group of people, led by a woman with an outstanding resume. You can check her out for yourself: Juliette.
I watched as, one by one, people from all over the world began listening to her. Then they began banding together to inform and protect each other, their families, and friends. They became the Zombie Survival Crew. Curious about the members of the group, I checked them out thinking that they were a bunch of lunatics who needed to up the dose on their meds.
That’s not what I found though. Yes, they’re a motley crew and a few really are lunatics but they’re also on the ball, well-informed, armed and ready to face the zombiepocalypse. You’ll find a lot of what I discovered here.
Shortly after joining the Zombie Survival Crew ranks I began to suspect someone within the Command structure itself might be a double agent, or under the control of the Unnamed Government Agency. I dug deeper and profiled the leaders of the ZSC. You can find that report here.
Within days after that report someone hacked into my email. My computer began acting odd and, during a scan for malware and viruses, I discovered spyware and a tracking cookie. I traced the source code but was picked up almost immediately. I managed to catch a few words just before the screen blacked out:
Νέο στέλεχος ενεργοποιηθεί. Απροσδόκητα αποτελέσματα. Πολύ συνέχεια …
Χωρίς άδεια πρόσβασης Ενεργοποίηση αυτοκαταστροφής σκουλήκι.
My computer grumbled, flashed then went dead. Whatever was sent back through my system burnt out the processor and power supply completely destroying my computer and everything on it. The translation of the message that flashed on my computer screen before it died is:
New strain activated. Unexpected results. Much more pow …
Unauthorized Access Enable feedback worm.
That’s all I needed to know. I hit the road and have spent the last month on the run. I’ve had to change identities in order to avoid capture. An unknown entity @Cher_Dawn_ appeared on twitter in my place. She’s not to be trusted and, for all I know, is a member of UGA trying to infiltrate the ZSC presenting herself as me. She’s not. You may be tempted to delete her but perhaps it is wiser if we keep our collective eyes on her activities. And please check to make sure you are following me: @Wulfie_
It was foolish of me, I know but, once I found out that this @Cher_Dawn_ was masquerading as me, I began watching my home. No-one was there but the place had been ransacked and bugged. I grabbed a few things I’d left behind and, on my way out the door found something disturbing. It must have fallen out of someone’s pocket…or been ripped off during a struggle. One thing is clear: UGA is on to me.
Hey Command, if you manage to intercept this message: We are being targeted. The UGA may have originally come only after central command figures, but your Special Agents are now being hunted as well. It is only a matter of time, really, until the UGA takes aim at all the ZSC cadres. But then it’s possible that one of YOU is a double agent, isn’t it? I should’ve expected some sort of treachery.
Grae, if you happen to get this, good work on that last report. Watch your back, pal and trust no-one.
Jinxie_G, if you’re out there. Keep moving. It’s the only way you’ll be safe. Check all your gear for bugs and tracking devices. They’ve found me twice because of a GPS hidden in my cell phone. Be safe, chica.
Anyways, what I found on the floor is a piece of cloth with a design on it. I’ve seen it before but can’t remember where. There’s a little blood on it.
I have to go now. I don’t dare stay in one place long. I’m tired and so hungry that squirrels are starting to look tasty. Will report back when I can.
With the holidays upon us, things have been a little hectic around the command center. Not only are processing all the reports coming in of suspected zombie activity, and with the cold temperatures who knows what will happen, the Oracle is dancing around sprinkling tinsel everywhere and has put up so many blinking lights the command center looks like a 70’s discotech. So despite the serious task at hand, command does have the holiday spirit.And blow that sucker’s
It has been a wild, crazy, and sometimes downright chaotic twelve months. For those of us who were here when the foundation was laid for the Zombie Survival Crew, those twelve months have flown by. When we sat back recently to look over the progress we’ve made we realized how truly astonishing an accomplishment this empire really is.
