Myth Bashing – Fast and Furious

Once again, it is time to delve into the realm of myth to find the sliver of truth behind some of the misinformation you, loyal ZSC brigadiers, may have heard while preparing for the Zombiepocalypse.

Myth: The only way to make a safe getaway is to have a souped-up zombie survival car.

Fact: Bells and whistled sure do draw a lot of unwanted attention.

There has been a trend in the last couple of years wherein folks have taken it upon themselves to try and modify their vehicles so that they have a fighting chance during post-apocalyptic scenarios. Personally, we blame one-too-many viewings of Mad Max and Tank Girl.

Awhile back, we discussed what vehicles would be rugged enough to survive the zombie onslaught. At that time, the best candidate was a fictional behemoth—part tank, part mobile command base, called “Dead Reckoning” from Romero’s Land of the Dead. And to be honest, it is still what I’d, personally, want to travel around in.

However, in June Hyundai announced that they’d teamed up with The Walking Dead’s Robert Kirkman to produce their ideal “Zombie Survival Machine” to celebrate the release of the comic book’s 100th installment. The vehicle was on display at San Diego Comic-Con in July and yours truly got to see if this modified Hyundai Elantra lives up to our idea of what it takes to survive the Zombiepocalypse.

Vehicle Specs: Mounted to the front is a massive spiked plow to move any oncoming zombies. An armored roof hatch opens, allowing the passenger to safely shoot attackers. Massive auxiliary off-road-spec lamps on the roof light the way. A winch on the nose of the car should come in handy, right? It also has racing wheels with huge serrated blades attached to the rims. To top it off, there are welded caged window openings to prevent the undead from reaching through and grabbing you.

There’s a CB radio to keep in contact with the others back at camp. A pair of machetes are mounted beside the center console as a just-in-case weapon. There are also explosives, a net launcher in the trunk and a fully functioning NOS system installed—on the off chance that you need even more bang-for-your-buck.

What is the “Zombie Survival Machine” lacking? Storage space. The net launcher eats up almost all of the trunk area. If you’re using a car at the end of days, you’re going to want to be able to shove everything you think is vital inside to make a getaway.

Cars in the Zombiepocalypse will all have one fatal flaw, no matter what shiny gadgets are strapped onto it—the need for fuel. Unless manufacturers begin producing a vehicle that runs strictly on water or solar power, depending on a vehicle past the first couple of weeks will be impossible. Invest on a couple good pairs of hiking boots and for your traveling needs.