The Fearless Leader of the Zombie Survival CrewTM, Juliette Terzieff has been rambling around the country for almost a year recruiting for the cause. She has been working tirelessly on not enough sleep, not enough food, and waaaaay too much caffeine to make sure she is selecting the best for the crew. There are those of us in command who feel that she has, on occasion, come perilously close to being mistaken for a shambler herself. This crossbow twirling leader of the Red Brigade is building up all the brigades with the right match of commanders to lieutenants and all this while dodging the attentions of the Unnamed Government Agency (UGA) who have kidnapped her on one occasion and have basically been a pain in our side since standing up operations. But since she just successfully completed the mission of securing both first and second lieutenants for all of the brigades, before she collapsed in a heap, she asked that I share the information with the entire crew.
Red Brigade
As is only fitting, we’ll start things off with the Red Brigade itself. Capably led by Juliette Terzieff, the coffee-mainlining former war correspondent known as the chief or the boss lady around command center, this brigade is prepped and ready for action. While most consider the crossbow, her personal weapon choice, the most formidable weapon in her arsenal, those in command know better — the most feared weapon, which is deployed on a regular basis, is the tackle hug. Get caught by one of those babies, and you’ll be thankful to take a crossbow bolt any day of the week. This is how we knew first lieutenant Neil Brown, Jr. was the right man to be her right-hand man — he is trained in martial arts and can survive the tackle hug with ease.
Neil also is known as a leader who does what is needed to keep his people safe. A very important quality for the Red Brigade. On top of that, he is charming and has ably seconded the chief’s efforts at recruitment. Currently Neil is racketing about the country on various secret missions for command, but when the chief calls, he is there ready to take on more assignments. But when the tide turns and the walkers are coming, you want to make sure you stay clear of the swing of his katana.
To round out current Red Brigade command, we have one of the newest recruits, second lieutenant Viviana Chavez. While new to the crew, her enthusiasm and loyalties are clear. And she didn’t hesitate to call for the .44 Magnum as her weapon of choice. Which shows she means business and is ready to rumble to help support and save her crew.
Your Red Brigade Command
Juliette Terzieff Commander Red Brigade
Neil Brown, Jr. First Lieutenant Red Brigade
Viviana Chavez Second Lieutenant Red Brigade
Stay tuned in the coming week for more command announcements as well as further information on who makes up the leadership of YOUR brigade.
Our Fearless Leader, Juliette Terzieff, gets thrown down by JB Maddawg at Chicago Comic Con mid August (2011).
From the Throw Down: Anyway, once I found Rants, we ran into an interesting booth and decided to find out a bit more. Turns out it was for a pretty wicked premise for an entire brand called the Zombie Survival Crew. Rather than sit hear and read what the deal is all about, we figured you’d rather see the vid and let one of the ZSC folks tell you directly.
I recently had the opportunity to conduct a joint mission with Orange Brigade First Lieutenant David Della Rocco. And while he is definitely in possession of a wicked sense of humor, it is the intensity he possesses for completing the task at hand that leaves the most lasting impression.
When the chips are down and the zombies swarming, there’s no doubt David will be found on the front line urging Zombie Survival Crew troops through battle.
As we all make our preparations for the onset of a cataclysmic event David’s left a message for the ZSC faithful.
The Chicago Comicon was a bit more than your commander-in-chief expected. Sure we in Zombie Survival Crew command pre-planned for massive crowds, sore feet, lost voices, and puffy bags under our eyes. We even had a strategic operation parameters in place for the zombies we knew would attend.
What I wasn’t prepared for was a battle to the near death with two of my co-Commanders, Blue Brigade leader Norman Reedus and Light Blue Brigade head Anthony Guajardo.
It all started early Saturday morning when I and Yellow Brigade commander Jinxie G noticed a significantly more obvious presence of walkers at the event than we had seen on Friday. We were bombarded at the temporary ZSC command post by groups of people eager to discover any survival tips they could use immediately. Quite a few people said they were ready to fight; a few even had weapons with them.
I calmly explained there was unlikely to be any actual battle inside the convention hall and most people seemed to accept that a bunch of walkers at a Con wasn’t too much of an immediate risk.
That all worked fine until the Zombie Crawl began. Pandemonium erupted as dozens of zombies converged near ZSC command. Their moans were so severe they almost drowned out the screams of everyone else. I tried in vain to explain to panicky humans that the zombies were under careful watch of the convention organizers. I rushed into the crowd of zombies to try and calm everyone down – and that’s when it happened.
I was bit.
Within seconds I found myself under assault from fellow Zombie Survival Crew commanders. Blue Brigade commander Norman Reedus grabbed me in a chokehold – taking care to cover his mouth and not breathe in any germs I might be spreading or inadvertently get hit on the mouth by flying blood specks.
I croaked that the bite had been from a panicked human and NOT a zombie. Norman let me go but stayed right behind me. For a moment I found the thought of his continuing concern to be really sweet, until I spotted Light Blue Brigade commander Anthony Guajardo coming at me with a katana!
I turned to yell at Norman but he was gone. I learned later he had sprinted off to make sure other ZSC commanders were out of harm’s way.
Anthony was already swinging by the time I turned back around. As the blade approached my neck I shouted “I’m not infected!!!” It was just enough to get Anthony to pull the blade to a stop, though he did not actually let his guard down until about three hours later. Instead he followed me around with the darned katana. And believe me, the guys over at Dragonsong Forge who made that beautiful piece of weaponry are going to hear it from me personally very soon.
After I calmed down enough not to want to seriously hurt my fellow commanders, I decided this little experience holds some valuable lessons:
Panic is the enemy and ZSC members should avoid entering a mob even if those they care about are inside it. You’re better served prowling the edges and picking off walkers, or hightailing it out of the area.
Stick to the plan. ZSC members have their own individual survival plans, and the official ZSC escape planning we’re revealing shortly on the site to help guide them. Yes the unexpected will crop up and you’ll have to deal with it best you can, but having a plan in place can save your life.
Sometimes a pause can save a life. If Norman and Anthony had not given me those few seconds to explain, well, I wouldn’t be writing right now. I’m not 100% sure I’d recommend it in the heat of battle, but I sure am grateful.
Help when you can but be cognizant of the risks. The ZSC firmly believes we fight together or die alone. Working together also means defending one another, and that could someday cost you your life.
Over the last several weeks we at Zombie Survival Crew command have been gathering, sorting and assessing zombie infiltration threats from ZSC loyalists and Commanders around the U.S. and the world.
There have been reports of zombie activity in Vermont, Texas and Illinois.
Confirmed sightings in Florida, Pennsylvania and New Jersey, as well as in Bulgaria and the U.K.
Our bottom line assessment is that the time to act is quickly approaching. With that in mind we prepared the following emergency dispatch PSA to alert Zombie Survival Crew members to the growing danger. But as you’ll see, our communications have been intercepted…several channels compromised. We believe we know who is behind the attack.
Zombie Survival Crew Command urges all members to make personal contact with Command at every opportunity. For those around Chicago next weekend, several senior ZSC commanders including myself, Jinxie G, Anthony Guajardo, Norman Reedus, Sean Patrick Flanery, David Della Rocco and Addy Miller, will be making appearances at the Wizard World Comicon. If you can beat the horde, please visit the official temporary Zombie Survival Crew command post at the event for a debriefing.
For those of you who are not – we hope you will be able to make personal contact over the coming months and rest assured The Oracle is working purple brigade magic to reestablish secure communications.
Red Brigade Commander Juliette Terzieff explains the reasons for her choices of essential Go Bag items… But in order to see what the reasons are, you’ll need to login and if you are not a registered member, please take a few moments and register for the site. The links for both the login and the Member Registration can be found in the sidebar to the right.
I knew I was taking a risk by flying a commercial airline to rendezvous with our fearless leader, Juliette, in Philadelphia. It was a risk which had to be taken, though. The UGA has been trying to get a bead on me for months, and I felt exposed as I drove up to the airport. Fortunately, there were enough people around that they didn’t attempt an outright snatch in broad daylight. And yes, I knew where the danger lay… the security checkpoint.
Why would the Purple Brigade Commander travel via commercial air when I have a working flux capacitor at my disposal, you ask? Well, the answer lies in keeping the flux capacitor under wraps until it is absolutely necessary. The UGA doubts that I have a working model, and I want to play to those doubts. If they had any idea of some of the modifications I’ve made… well, let’s just say I might become numero uno on their list of commanders to abduct–along with my gadget.
The sweat beaded my brow as I approached the license checkpoint. I arrived at the airport via a circuitous route, and was fairly certain I was not followed, but the security officer would alert the UGA immediately upon checking my identity, I was sure of that. After detaining me so bin stands could be moved from one place to the next, she waved me on to the security checkpoint. I took off my shoes, and placed them with my keys in one bin, and put all of my electronics in another bin. The tension mounted as the bins slid toward the scanner. An agent approached me from behind and said my bins could be consolidated, which she did. I quickly double checked to ensure nothing was planted among my possessions. Phew!!! I continued toward the scanner.
Once my articles were on the conveyor belt, I stepped through the people scanner and an alarm went off. I stepped back, my heart slightly accelerating. I KNEW I didn’t have any metal on my person and suspected foul play. But when I stepped back through the x-ray, I came through clean. Then it was a matter for waiting for my bin to come through. And that’s when they nearly had me.
<-- I have had one of those on my keychain. A pink plastic stick. Yes, I know it’s a kubaton which is potentially a weapon, but it’s pink and plastic for pete’s sake–how can anyone take it seriously?? But here’s where the genius of the UGA comes into play…I was right to suspect the agent who “assisted” me with the bins, and here’s why. Apparently, as long as airport security catches what they consider to be a contraband item prior to exiting the scanner, and you freely surrender the item, then no harm–no foul. BUT if it makes it all the way through the scanner and someone identifies that you have it after the fact, and you didn’t surrender it prior to going through the security check point, then you get a little trip to see the judge… in other words, you’re under arrest.
Fortunately for me, I was alert (I’m always preaching constant vigilance… and it pays off) and took note of everything that was happening, so that security, when they realized I would make them laughingstocks in front of the judge, decided that even though I did not surrender the mighty kubaton (and no I can’t say it without laughing) prior to going through the security checkpoint, that I was free to go. Why did they let me off? If they attempted to prosecute me, they would have had to explain how they not only missed stopping me 3 times, but also, I knew that at least 3 of their agents were unable to identify the kubaton as a weapon.
By the way, my electric toothbrush would be a much better weapon than a pink plastic stick… it has a sharp metal tip which is strong, vibrates at an extreme rate and would easily go through someone’s temple or throat. #justsayin Anyway, the first failure… the agent who scanned my license noticed the kubaton when I placed it in the bin and radioed to another agent to have him stop me. He failed to reach me prior to going through the security check point. Next failure, although I’m sure this agent was a UGA agent masquerading as airport security… the agent who moved my keys with the kubaton attached not only failed to note that it was a weapon, but definitely didn’t stop me. It was in her best interest that I be detained long enough to miss my flight. Oh and the UGA tampered with our fearless leader’s car as well, so she had difficulty in reaching our rendezvous point. The third failure? The agent scanning the items thought that the kubaton was a pencil, and let it go through unquestioned, but was sure my inhaler (from my recent bout with bronchitis) was a lethal weapon… until they looked. And then there was the discussion about whether the kubaton attached to my keys was “real” or not. Although the guard responsible for detaining me, took himself and the situation extremely seriously and accused me of knowing it was a weapon. Yes, I carry it for self-defense…and have never used it.
The kicker? I flew last month on business (non-ZSC business) and no one questioned the fact that I had a pink plastic stick on my keychain.
You know all of the ZSC Commanders have duct tape for a reason, right? You’ve seen them talk about it on Twitter, and it’s on their lists for their Go Bag essentials. Well, the duct tape is generally used to keep our fearless leader Juliette Terzieff in line because let me tell you, that woman is crazy sometimes!
All kidding aside, I’m here today to inform you of something I recently discovered. You see, I’ve been going through the files when I’m on duty in the Command Center to make sure I know exactly who these people are that I’m working with now. You can call it snooping if you’d like, but a guy’s gotta know what he’s dealing with around here.
I recently found this beauty:
That’s a picture of Juliette in a burqa, taken in Pakistan in 2004. She’s the one on the left.
Due to said picture, I’m inclined to suspect our fearless leader, folks. She says the outfit was necessary at the time for work, but I think she’s a lot more than meets the eye, and I’m determined to get to the bottom of this.
*looks at RC Murphy* What do you mean Jinxie G speaks Arabic? Hmm . . . I wonder how many other languages she speaks. And why did she keep it a secret from me? After all, I’m her first lieutenant… a commander should never keep secrets from her right hand man.
And speaking of secrets… *steals another look at RC Murphy* …I wonder how many other things commander Murphy knows that she’s not telling. Since she’s the command’s secret keeper, I’ll bet it’s a lot. I’m going to have to try to get close to her and see whether I can get her to spill. Maybe I can get her first lieutenant, Rocco, to help me out. I’m going to need the information she has.
Anyway, as you can see from this video, the one where our fearless leader *snorts* thinks I tried to run her over, that is definitely NOT the case. I pulled it off her phone when she wasn’t looking. Anthony Michael Hall helped me out with that one. Thanks, man.
Oh, she can claim I tried to run her over all she wants, but I think it’s pretty apparent that I was just having fun there.
And speaking of Anthony Michael Hall, I really need to find out what makes his commander tick. How does the Oracle know all that she does? I think she might hold the key to the entire operation. That alone makes me suspicious, but Anthony Michael trusts her, and he’s pretty savvy, so I’ll just keep a watchful eye for now.
In a nutshell, I am beginning to suspect quite a few things around here, but not to worry; I’ll get to the bottom of it all and keep you, dear crew members, informed.
And if I have to take over to get this place running correctly, you can bet I will.
The approach was unexpected. I was re-sorting gear for the umpteenth time at the Zombie Survival Crew temporary command post at Spooky Empire recently when a voice called out: “Zombie Survival Crew. I need to know about this.”
Now there really isn’t much that will leave your fearless commander-in-chief speechless but when I looked up and saw Ted Raimi standing there my jaw dropped. I did a lightning-fast mental check to regain my senses and sputtered out a greeting.
Over peppermint candies and gum I walked Ted through ZSC command protocols and mission parameters with permagrin he was kind enough not to comment on. I do believe I even stuttered a few times. Nonetheless, Ted accepted a Command mission and assignment on the spot and walked away with ZSC gear to call his own.
Ted’s years of experience fighting demons, the possessed and all manner of the undead gives him a definitive edge against the zombie hordes. He thinks fast but strategically, and has an unnerving store of knowledge about weapons.
The Fearless Leader of the Zombie Survival CrewTM, Juliette Terzieff has been rambling around the country for almost a year recruiting for the cause. She has been working tirelessly on not enough sleep, not enough food, and waaaaay too much caffeine to make sure she is selecting the best for the crew. There are those of us in command who feel that she has, on occasion, come perilously close to being mistaken for a shambler herself. This crossbow twirling leader of the Red Brigade is building up all the brigades with the right match of commanders to lieutenants and all this while dodging the attentions of the Unnamed Government Agency (UGA) who have kidnapped her on one occasion and have basically been a pain in our side since standing up operations. But since she just successfully completed the mission of securing both first and second lieutenants for all of the brigades, before she collapsed in a heap, she asked that I share the information with the entire crew.
